What to Say to a Middle School Girl Who Hates Her Body

Posted: 6 years ago

What to Say to a Middle School Girl Who Hates Her Body

Dear Middle School Girl,

I’m talking to you, the one who wishes they could change some part of your body.

I want to tell you about a 12-year-old girl nicknamed “poof”. That would be me. I have a lot of hair that’s not quite curly or quite straight. When I blow dry it, it looks like, well, a big poof ball.

Eventually, I discovered a flat iron and then a curling iron and my bosses even let me Anchor some newscasts with that poofy hair.

Fast forward to now and I’m a mom with a blog. I get messages from other moms asking how I do my hair. Can you believe it- for a girl once nicknamed “Poof”?

This past weekend I was at a Down syndrome conference, where one mom walked up to me and said “I follow your blog! And I love your hair”

My point is this: compliments on your on physical appearance that may mean so much right now, won’t be all that important later. The compliments that matter? The ones letting you know how you are positively impacting lives.

At that same conference, a mom came up to me and told me that my writing helped her during her diagnosis experience. This is the reassurance that meant something to me.

Maybe for you one day, it will be a compliment on your leadership style in the workplace or the scientific research you’re doing that has the capability to make lasting change, or how your children are a light to those around them.

These will be the reassurances that matter, the ones that keep you going.

I know it may be hard to see past this weekend’s party right now. Or at least it would have been for me back then. No one expects you to find your passion at 13. Start with doing something kind for someone every day. I promise you this- it’s more rewarding than being the girl with the good hair.

*What to Say to a Middle School Girl Who Hates Her Body

Jillian Benfield

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